Friday 2 September 2011

a thing about my life by Albert S. Stevensonanderstokenacrobergonson.

hi reader. if your reading this doc then either i gave it you or ben probly nicked it from my caravan and is using it to make fun of me. well my life is absolutely fine thank you very much. i just recently bought one of them tree air freshners that smell of mint to stick on me window. my ex has stopped sending me death threats after i threw a brick at her door last week. and i got invited to a party that i went to last night. it was quite good. this man came up to me and said i had nice hands. and asked me to go with him outside. but i said no cause i dont follow strangers. then some teens standing next to me at the bar started staring at me and one of them called me a flod. then they all walked away.

my dad also rang yesterday to tell me how much he still hates me. and i went to the shop to get some milk and some skittles. i didnt mix them together. bens dog pood outside my caravan again that afternoon aswell. he says if he doesnt see it then he doesnt pick it up. to be honest hes a bit of an idiot. what if a child or an old woman steps in it. they wont be very happy then. searched again for a job in the paper but no luck. did find an ad for an ok lookin dyson hoover for cheap though. tried lookin for job on the internet but got sidetracked by a email someone sent me telling me to forward it to 10 people in half an hour or a man would come into my house at night and stab me or something. glad i managed to do it in time.

today a wasp came into my caravan and sat on my tv remote whilst i was still watching tv. i remained calm for a few seconds then screamed at it. it didnt move so i threw a coin at it. it flew up and came at me. i got up and ran into the toilet. i hid there for a bit. i had somehow fallen asleep whilst in there. when i woke up and got out it had finally gone. i hate wasps. dont really see the point in them. all they do is annoy people and fly around like they own the place and get in my sandwiches and stuff. if you know the point of them dont hesistate to tell me. please tell me. i need to know.

at this point i cant think what to write. so im just gonna say some stuff. bald people make me laugh. all my friends are emos. i hate you philip. my towels have all been soiled by the cats down the street. its 01:48am. im typing this on microsoft word 2007. scissors make me cry. leds are cool. my usb is crap cause it dont hold much. ive written about half a paragraph so far. there are numerous posters of david tennant and rhianna on one of my walls. them rumours bout me and sally aint true. i swears. people keep staring at me like i have no eyebrows. i should probably stop wearing a tux under my normal clothes. its a bit sweaty. if ben puts his stereo up to 15 volume i shall scream.

well, bye

Al

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